So, here's the sitch. I'm snowed-in. Beto is not. He had to take our only all-wheel-drive car to an all-day meeting... so, I'm stuck on Mt. Hazeltine, and unless Tenzing Norgay plans on popping by for some leftovers from Saturday's party, I have nothing to do but sit in my pajamas and work remotely. Well... sit in my pajamas, work remotely AND roam the internet for hours on end.
In the midst of my mid-life or third-life or whatever-life crisis, I've been thinking about things I really, really want to do badly... and haven't come up with a whole lot more than belt out the Indigo Girls' "Land of Canaan" in some backwater karaoke bar and write a novel. I don't know if it's the malaise or the weather or just general dissatisfaction, but just as I lack creativity for my blog, so too do I lack creativity for my future.
That said, I found this list of 100 things to do before you die, the object being to "bold" those you have done... so without further ado, and because I follow directions like a madman, below in bold are my accomplishments to-date (at least, the ones I will admit to).
1. Started your own blog (Hello, Mistress of the Obvious)
2. Slept under the stars (and under the bugs, and on top of cow poo)
3. Played in a band (just because I'm pathetic, I'm counting third- through fifth- grade here)
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity (especially if the charity is Pottery Barn)
7. Been to Disneyland (or was it Disney World? Can't recall - the big mouse with BIG effin' ears and his infinitely annoying girlfriend...)
8. Climbed a mountain (just not to the top)
9. Held a praying mantis (I'm not so pathetic as to think that photographing one counts)
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped (it's on video, haters)
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea (is the storm at sea, or am I? If the former, then CHECK)
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch (is photography an art? I don't know)
15. Adopted a child (dogs and cats, people... for crying out loud)
16. Had food poisoning (not a sound diet strategy)
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables (I barely even EAT vegetables)
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight (this one's kind of creepy, but childhood slumber parties have to count somewhere)
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill (NEVER EVER NEVER! Hear that, bosses?)
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb (I ate lamb once, then ralphed it back up, so I'm counting this as one. I also used to sleep next to a calf until the ranch owners castrated it, at which point I was persona non grata)
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon (I only run when being chased... by someone with a gun...sorry)
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice (sinking a paddle boat on the Susquehanna has to count for something)
29. Seen a total eclipse (I've seen it sung really badly, but that's about it)
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise (my own personalized idea of what the third ring of Dante's Inferno would look like, if it were one of those Royal Caribbean type deals... but I have been on day cruises).
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors (Havre de Grace counts, right?)
35. Seen an Amish community (was almost run over by an Amish horse and buggy. That's before I learned that they make their millions in puppy mills and play dirty hockey against the Mennonites)
36. Taught yourself a new language (KTJ's Op)
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied (Shyeah, right)
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo's David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant (sucky-ass blind dates and their penny pinching ways)
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris (Paris, again... honest to god)
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theatre
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business (doesn't matter if it doesn't make any money, right?)
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies (one day with Renee... I was not Girl Scout material)
62. Gone whale watching (didn't you hear about the whale that destroyed the sailboat in one flying leap? Helloooo, self preservation).
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma (insert trifling vampire obsession joke here)
65. Gone sky diving
66. [deleted]
67. Bounced a check (All hail overdraft protection!)
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favourite childhood toy (I have, like, six cases of the furry little friends)
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt (will never do that again)
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades (we're on a roll here....)
75. Been fired from a job (roll stopped)
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone (I think Ellen's one-woman warfare against knee cartilage should count here)
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book (I'm mentioned in a book, but that probably doesn't meet the strident criteria here)
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible (okay, just the New Testament... I can't get past the begats)
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating (ugh - who created this list?)
88. Had chicken pox
89. Saved someone's life
90. Sat on a jury (truthfully, I've been called for jury duty, but they always kick me out)
91. Met someone famous (haven't really met them, but saw George Clinton and Richard Simmons at the airport ... not together... no need to start any seriously screwed up rumors here... Also, saw Michelle Williams at a DoveLewis event.... and, hmmm... what else?)
92. Joined a book club (like I give a rip what other people have to say about the books I choose to read. I never fully understood this concept.)
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby (Amen, and hallelujah, NO... "better late than pregnant," they say)
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a lawsuit
98. Owned a cell phone (what the hell?)
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day
In the midst of my mid-life or third-life or whatever-life crisis, I've been thinking about things I really, really want to do badly... and haven't come up with a whole lot more than belt out the Indigo Girls' "Land of Canaan" in some backwater karaoke bar and write a novel. I don't know if it's the malaise or the weather or just general dissatisfaction, but just as I lack creativity for my blog, so too do I lack creativity for my future.
That said, I found this list of 100 things to do before you die, the object being to "bold" those you have done... so without further ado, and because I follow directions like a madman, below in bold are my accomplishments to-date (at least, the ones I will admit to).
1. Started your own blog (Hello, Mistress of the Obvious)
2. Slept under the stars (and under the bugs, and on top of cow poo)
3. Played in a band (just because I'm pathetic, I'm counting third- through fifth- grade here)
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity (especially if the charity is Pottery Barn)
7. Been to Disneyland (or was it Disney World? Can't recall - the big mouse with BIG effin' ears and his infinitely annoying girlfriend...)
8. Climbed a mountain (just not to the top)
9. Held a praying mantis (I'm not so pathetic as to think that photographing one counts)
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped (it's on video, haters)
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea (is the storm at sea, or am I? If the former, then CHECK)
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch (is photography an art? I don't know)
15. Adopted a child (dogs and cats, people... for crying out loud)
16. Had food poisoning (not a sound diet strategy)
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables (I barely even EAT vegetables)
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight (this one's kind of creepy, but childhood slumber parties have to count somewhere)
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill (NEVER EVER NEVER! Hear that, bosses?)
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb (I ate lamb once, then ralphed it back up, so I'm counting this as one. I also used to sleep next to a calf until the ranch owners castrated it, at which point I was persona non grata)
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a marathon (I only run when being chased... by someone with a gun...sorry)
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice (sinking a paddle boat on the Susquehanna has to count for something)
29. Seen a total eclipse (I've seen it sung really badly, but that's about it)
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise (my own personalized idea of what the third ring of Dante's Inferno would look like, if it were one of those Royal Caribbean type deals... but I have been on day cruises).
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors (Havre de Grace counts, right?)
35. Seen an Amish community (was almost run over by an Amish horse and buggy. That's before I learned that they make their millions in puppy mills and play dirty hockey against the Mennonites)
36. Taught yourself a new language (KTJ's Op)
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied (Shyeah, right)
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo's David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant (sucky-ass blind dates and their penny pinching ways)
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris (Paris, again... honest to god)
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theatre
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business (doesn't matter if it doesn't make any money, right?)
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies (one day with Renee... I was not Girl Scout material)
62. Gone whale watching (didn't you hear about the whale that destroyed the sailboat in one flying leap? Helloooo, self preservation).
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma (insert trifling vampire obsession joke here)
65. Gone sky diving
66. [deleted]
67. Bounced a check (All hail overdraft protection!)
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favourite childhood toy (I have, like, six cases of the furry little friends)
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt (will never do that again)
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades (we're on a roll here....)
75. Been fired from a job (roll stopped)
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone (I think Ellen's one-woman warfare against knee cartilage should count here)
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book (I'm mentioned in a book, but that probably doesn't meet the strident criteria here)
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible (okay, just the New Testament... I can't get past the begats)
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating (ugh - who created this list?)
88. Had chicken pox
89. Saved someone's life
90. Sat on a jury (truthfully, I've been called for jury duty, but they always kick me out)
91. Met someone famous (haven't really met them, but saw George Clinton and Richard Simmons at the airport ... not together... no need to start any seriously screwed up rumors here... Also, saw Michelle Williams at a DoveLewis event.... and, hmmm... what else?)
92. Joined a book club (like I give a rip what other people have to say about the books I choose to read. I never fully understood this concept.)
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby (Amen, and hallelujah, NO... "better late than pregnant," they say)
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a lawsuit
98. Owned a cell phone (what the hell?)
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Read an entire book in one day